Home School Curriculum Experts

Homeschool weird. I’ll never forget that phrase being said. Granted, it wasn’t directed *at* me, but still it was said *to* me. By my sister-in-law (no surprise there). We were having a conversation at a nice restaurant with my in-laws, when she brought up the ever-fascinating subject of “why in the world do you homeschool?” This was back in the days when I would still sputter out weak, defensive answers every time I was presented with this question. And my sister-in-law is not one to appear weak and defenseless around. Actually, when her first child was born she considered homeschooling for a brief time, but then came to her senses and realized that she had apparently had a temporary lapse of sanity. After that she decided that, since homeschooling was not *her* choice, it shouldn’t be anyone’s. Have you ever met someone like that? Someone who takes offense to your very private choice on how to school your kids? I’ll bet there’s not a person reading this who has not experienced that response. I have often said that I don’t think homeschooling is for everyone, and in particular not for every parent. Although I think that every child could benefit in some way from being homeschooled, when you factor their parent into the equation sometimes the risks outweigh the benefits :) Seriously, though, when I talk about my choice to homeschool, it is almost NEVER with the thought that the person I am talking to should make the same choice. Often, though, I get a defensive or angry response, as if my education choice implies that theirs is wrong. I don’t get it.

But back to the “homeschool weird” thing. After a short discussion in which she refuted all of my answers to her questions, she said, “Well, my friends and I have talked about it, and all the kids at our church who homeschool are just weird. In fact, that’s what we call them…homeschool weird.” You can imagine the defense mechanisms that rose in me. Remember, this was before I went into my disarmament phase, and was still in defense mode. I asked her to explain what she meant. She went on to describe kids who were nerdy, goofy, immature, dressed oddly, and so on. Now, you would have to know my sister-in-law to know the filter you have to use with these statements. Those kids are probably not nearly as “weird” as she describes. But let’s face it – we all know kids that are like that…they may even be *our* kids. My first (and still, I believe, pretty accurate) response was “Honey, if they are like that, homeschooling didn’t make them that way. They may homeschool *because* they are that way, but they didn’t start out as cool, social, hip kids, and become weirdos because they do math at their kitchen table rather than at a desk at school.” But days after our conversation, my response bothered me. Not because I didn’t think it was mostly true, but because I felt I had in some way betrayed those who homeschool and are the square pegs, the ones who stand out from typical society, the “weirdos.” And I did it for selfish reasons – so that my kids would not, by association, be considered “homeschool weird” themselves. I was ashamed of myself. One of the very things that I like about homeschooling – that you can be different and not have to fit into society’s idea of typical or normal – I eschewed for the very shallow desire to see my kids fit in. I had to take a hard and painful look at myself. Was I really that concerned that my kids fit into a social realm that I honestly did not even like that much? My desire had always been for them to be different, to stand out from the crowd – did I only want that if they were also accepted and even sought after by that same crowd?

These days, I would be honored for my kids to be called “homeschool weird.” No, not for anything as trivial as the way they dress or whether or not they are nerds, but to be called that because they do not go along with the crowd for popularity’s sake; because they do things that are not socially advantageous because it is the right thing to do ; because they take to heart the words in I Timothy 4:12 , “Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity” …now that would be a “weird” worth being proud of.